Shattered Memories
by Omnitrix 12
Summary: The old dog had no name and no home; no memories save for screams, fear, and blood. All he wanted was escape, but the young stranger named Balto would not let him be... and neither would the visions and nightmares.
1. Chapter 1

A bracing arctic wind whistled softly through the pine forest surrounding Nome. Its soft but relentless force caused branches to swish and creak, and embraced a lone brown figure treading through it.

The canine, old and grizzled, lifted his snout to the air and drew the wind down his nostrils. The sharp, crisp feeling brought a sense of awakening to his tired frame as he concentrated on the scents it bore. _Rabbits, birds, a squirrel or two…_ Nothing of interest, since he wasn't hungry. He had fought a lone wolf over a deer carcass that morning and managed to fend it off – the sole advantage, he supposed, of what he'd been doing since he could remember. The wolf was long gone now, he having wandered one way and she the other.

Lowering his muzzle and giving a brief shiver to fend off the cold, then trudged on. He wasn't sure where he was going; wasn't sure of a lot of things. He had broken out of the _place_ about a week ago, and was now wandering with no particular aim except to get as far away from there as he could.

On and on he walked, but when he stopped to scent the air again, he froze. His eyes, weary with long travel, sharpened and hardened. He spread out his paws and bristled out his fur.

There was another scent near; feral dog, as best he could reckon. Male. An enemy?

"I know you're there!" he growled. "Show yourself!"

For a long moment, the silence of the woods gave no answer. Then a figure, brown and golden-eyed, came up over a low rise. "Hello yourself," greeted the stranger.

The wanderer paused, studying the newcomer warily. He could have sworn he smelled a dog, but the eyes were a wolf's. So were the massive paws which came into view. Part of each? He'd heard of such things.

Strangely, the wanderer felt himself growing a bit calmer. It must have been the way the stranger carried himself so placidly, as if he was used to strange dogs menacing him and was willing to take whatever came without complaint.

While this study was still going on, the newcomer spoke. "You must be new around here. Are you lost?"

The wanderer bristled a little. "No," he answered coldly. "Just…" he searched his brain for some answer. "… sightseeing. Who are you?"

"My name's Balto – and if you're sightseeing you picked a bad time for it. There's a bad storm on the way."

Of course, the wanderer knew all about the storm. He'd been keeping an eye peeled for some kind of shelter. He didn't like being advised of it by a total stranger, though. "Then you'd best be getting home."

Balto moved as if to turn around, then stopped and beckoned with his head all in one smooth movement. "There's a town this way with a boiler room if you want to wait out the storm."

 _Boiler room._ The old dog knew about those, or at least what the words meant. Dogs without some other place to be often congregated in them to take advantage of the heat. He didn't remember if he'd ever done it, but he wasn't sure he wanted to be around other dogs. Besides, he got the feeling boiler rooms were a human place. "What about you?" he asked, stalling.

* * *

"Well, myself I usually live in an old boat outside of town, or at my mate's house sometimes. You're welcome to stay at the boat, but I don't know if her family would welcome a strange dog."

The stranger growled slightly, making Balto step back. "Uh, sorry. I didn't mean that quite the way it sounded. I just meant that they know me, but…"

The strange dog snorted. "I don't go near humans." Then, seeing the look on Balto's face, he seemed to soften just a little. "Sorry. You said something about a boat?"

Balto tried not to take it too hard. Lots of dogs, he knew, distanced themselves from humans because of bad history. If it wasn't for Jenna and Rosie, he might have done much the same thing.

Returning to the question in front of him, he gestured with his head. "This way. Oh, and what's your name?"

 _My name,_ thought the old dog uncertainly. "Call me Shade."

* * *

It was about an hour's walk back to Nome, and considerably less time for Balto to wonder about his new acquaintance. _Maybe Boris is right,_ he mused. _I_ do _have a knack for picking up odd friends._ Apart from his name, Shade had told basically nothing about himself despite several attempts at friendly inquiry. It was pretty easy to guess he was from out of town, and it looked like he'd been banged up a bit, but all questions were either ignored or rebuffed.

 _Probably had a rough master,_ thought the wolf-dog, feeling a pang of sorrow for the old-timer. He'd had a rough time of it most of his life, being a stray, but with what some humans did to their dogs there were times when he was almost glad to be homeless.

"Sorry about the strange dog remark," he offered, hoping to thaw the ice if he couldn't break it. "My mate's got a really nice family if that's any help."

Shade seemed not to hear him at first. "Your… mate," he said, as if he were thinking hard about that. "She's got humans, but not you?"

Balto coughed. "Well, I sort of do most of the time. It's kind of a long story, but they like me. I'm just not really an indoor dog… or wolf-dog. It's great having a warm place where I'm accepted, but every now and then I like to sleep outside. Sometimes she joins me, especially in summer if the mosquitoes aren't so bad. But they always know to expect me if the weather's getting rough, and they, uh…" He had been about to say that Jenna's humans always had food for him if he dropped by, but he realized that might be indelicate. It wasn't like he could invite Shade in for some. A growl from the strange dog's stomach bolstered this cautious train of thought. "And if you're hungry, I know the places where you can usually find something," he offered, changing the subject.

"Hmm." Shade's moment of attentiveness seemed to falter as he grew distant again.

 _What's with him?_ wondered Balto. He got a strange feeling about Shade; a feeling much like the one he'd had about that suspicious vixen when he was looking for Aleu. There was something not right about him, like he ought to be one thing, but was something else or some _one_ else.

"What were our old humans like?" he asked.

Shade's lips pulled back slightly from his teeth. "I'd rather not talk about that, if you don't mind."

Balto couldn't help feeling somewhat abused, since he had offered this stranger his place for the night. Still, it seemed like the best choice all around was to just give him his space. Shade was obviously tired, and that storm wasn't getting any farther away.

"Do you want something to eat?" he asked. "I don't have much, but I know…"

Shade shook his head, irritated with the hybrid's persistence. "I'm not hungry," he answered decisively.

It was an obvious lie, and Balto frowned anxiously. "Well, okay," he relented. "Some other time, maybe?"

"Hmph. Don't count on it." Then he paused warily. "Thanks for having me."

Balto sighed and turned to go. "You're welcome, but I may be gone the whole night. Are you sure you'll be okay?"

 _What is with this pup?_ thought the stranger. Still, he couldn't be too angry with Balto; not after all the younger canine's hospitality. "I can handle a night by myself. Just… have a good time, okay?"

With a nod, Balto trotted off toward the town.

* * *

That night Shade wished Balto had returned, or – perhaps – that he had chanced a trip into town if only to find someplace not so drafty as the old wreck. A cruel north wind swept through every crack and around every corner, and though Shade huddled as far under the blanket as he could shrink, it felt as though he were encased in ice. His dreams – for he did sleep at length – were of mountains of ice and drifting snow.

Then, out of the darkness of sleep, a figure formed from the swirling flakes. Closer and closer they packed, until a living creature stood before him; a wolf, pure white with gleaming yellow eyes. Then he saw nothing but the eyes, burning into his with an intensity that made him pant as from a great heat in spite of the biting cold.

" _Who are you?"_

"What?" he asked. The voice seemed to come from too far away to be the figure before him, but he saw no one else; nothing else.

" _Who are you?"_

He shook his head. "I don't know who I am," he answered bitterly. "Who are _you_ anyway?"

" _Who are you?"_ pressed the voice. _"Who ARE you? Who ARE YOU? WHO ARE YOU?"_

"I don't know who I am!" Shade thundered, leaping towards the wolf only to have it vanish before him like smoke. He stared around, dumbfounded. "What?!"

" _WHO ARE YOU? WHO ARE YOU? WHO ARE YOU?"_


	2. 2 Mr Grim

The following day dawned, for Balto, as pleasantly as ever a day did for any dog. Warm blankets underneath him, sturdy walls all around… and his nose buried in the fur of Jenna's neck.

 _Mmmm…_ he hummed inwardly, brushing his muzzle through her coat. Her humans had cleaned her up not long before the storm hit, and her fur still carried that hint of freshness.

Before he was through enjoying the moment, however, Jenna stirred and pulled away with a giggle. "Balto, do you have to tickle me in the morning?"

 _Darn._ Chuckling in spite of himself, he pulled back and gave her a wounded look. "Well, excuse me, miss. I thought I woke up next to my gorgeous, sweet-tempered mate."

A quiet giggle escaped her lips, and she brushed her tongue against his face. "Flatterer," she murmured.

Their flirtation was cut short by a surge in the wind outside, wailing against the shuttered windows.

"Woo," Jenna murmured, shivering involuntarily. "I thought the storm was only supposed to last through the night."

Even though the shiver was purely from thinking about cold, Balto huddled closer to her. "One thing I learned growing up outside. Always count on storms staying past their welcome."

She nodded. "Well, I'd hate to be out there now. Can you imagine what it must be like outside?"

Balto felt a twist in his stomach, thinking of his guest. Boris would be alright. He had taken to staying in a corner of the boiler room on colder nights, now that he had Kodi there regularly to watch his back against dogs and humans who would see him as an entree. Shade, on the other paw…

"Balto?"

"What? Oh, sorry Jenna." He snapped out of his thoughts to find her amber eyes fixed curiously on him. "I was just thinking about Shade."

"Shade? Who's that?"

He shrugged. "Well, he's an old dog I found wandering in the woods yesterday. I couldn't convince him to come back to town, but I offered him my boat until the storm blows over."

"You mean he's out _there?_ " Jenna's eyes moved to the nearest window, and then to Rosie as the little girl began to stir.

Balto nodded, then rose reluctantly and arched his back to get the stiffness out. "I'd better go make sure he's okay. Boy, I feel bad about leaving him out all night. I won't be long."

With Rosie's voice behind him asking where he'd disappeared to, Balto slipped out of the house into the storm. The wind blew in heavy gusts, and the snow was piled up in ever-shifting heaps. With landmarks mostly invisible until you were close enough to walk right into them, Balto had to rely almost entirely on his sense of direction. Shivering against the icy flakes as they accumulated in his fur, he forged ahead until the old boat loomed over him.

"Shade?" he called out, trying to be heard over the wind as he made his way up the gangplank. It was tricky maneuvering, icy as it was underpaw, but he managed to gain the deck and get into the little room where he had last seen the strange dog.

The problem was, now he was the only one in there.

"Shade?!" he called out, getting worried. He scented around and caught Shade's smell leaving the room. No visible tracks, but the smell – muted as it was – was unmistakable.

He made his way to the rail and looked around. Squinting through the blowing flakes, he managed to detect an impression in the snow which _might_ have come from someone landing in it. Unless his eyes were playing tricks on him, though, the impression was far enough out that the dog would have had to be running and have made a flying leap.

 _Why would he do that?_ "Shade!" he shouted.

Finding no other sign, he made a jump for the impression, dug his way out of the snow, and sniffed. Shade had definitely passed this way.

Still sniffing and by now more anxious than ever, he forged ahead until he spotted a figure in the distance.

"Shade!" he called. Then, throwing back his head, he howled.

The reaction was immediate. "Get away!" Shade shouted, even audible through the wind. "I'm warning you, don't come an inch closer or else, whatever you are!"

 _Whatever I am?_ thought Balto, puzzled as all get-out. "Shade, it's me! It's Balto!"

There was a pause. "Balto?" asked Shade as if he couldn't quite place the name.

"Yes, Balto! I came to ask if-"

"You never told me your boat was haunted!" snapped the dog in accusation.

 _Haunted?_ Balto wondered what that was all about. "What do you mean?"

"Ghosts! All around me last night!"

Balto shook his head. He didn't know why Shade would say there were ghosts on that boat, unless maybe Boris had holed up belowdecks in one of the small spaces and made some noise. Still, there were more important issues to worry about – mainly getting out of this storm.

"Well, I came to ask if you wanted someplace else anyway. That old tub's not much good in this weather."

"Not much good in any weather."

 _Good grief, what's with this guy?_ "Well, I promise there are no ghosts in town, alright? You want to come or not?"

It took some convincing, but in the end Shade agreed and followed Balto. The wind seemed to intensify behind them, blowing their fur the wrong way and knifing down to their skin. Air and icy flakes whipped at them, chilling and burning like a thousand tiny whips. Balto had to keep looking back to make sure Shade was following him, and as they passed by the boat the old dog suddenly cut a wide arc around it so that he nearly vanished in the whiteness.

 _What's going on with him?_ he wondered again.

"What did you mean about ghosts on there anyway?" he asked, moving to join Shade.

"Ghosts," the dog repeated, almost as if it was the only word he knew. Then, seeing this wasn't enough, he went on. "All night I had these nightmares about this wolf made of snow demanding to know who I was. Then there were these… these other dogs all around me, covered in blood and cuts."

Though Shade had just said it was a dream, a shiver went straight down his spine at the hearing of it. A wolf made of snow? Dogs covered in blood?

Shade went on. "I woke up, and there was the wolf again, standing over me, staring into my eyes like it wanted to tear my thoughts out or something."

"Tear your thoughts out?" echoed Balto, confused. Then, catching the other bit of strangeness, "And you said they were standing over you?"

"As real as you are, and yes. I don't know how else to put it. It was like it was trying to drag everything I knew out of me. So I ran… and I kept running until you caught up with me. Why didn't you warn me about that boat?"

Balto frowned. The white wolf might have been his mother, but he couldn't imagine her acting the way Shade described. From his telling this wolf sounded more like one of the demons he heard humans talk about sometimes.

"I've had some weird dreams on that boat," he admitted, "but nothing like that one."

Shade shook his head. "Well, I'm not going back there. I'll die first, and that's that."

"Alright, alright." Clearly the only recourse at this point was to back down. "No going back. Got it."

It was a long and unpleasant march to get them into town to the boiler room, and Balto spent most of it turning this bizarre account over in his mind. Ghosts on board his boat? Was Shade crazy?

Then he paused his train of thought. Maybe Shade was crazy.

 _And I'm taking him right into town,_ he thought uneasily. _Right to a place where Boris, my kids, and all their friends hang out all the time. Good_ night, _what am I doing?_

He glanced over at Shade, who was shivering like mad, and shook his head. He couldn't leave Shade to struggle through the cold and the wet, especially in these dark months of the year. It wouldn't be right.

At last they got into the boiler room, where a handful of men were piling fuel into the furnace. In spite of the cold outside several of them had stripped to the waist because of the heat and labor. In the corner, the sled team lay on some old sacks watching the humans. Kodi instantly perked up at the sight of his father walking in.

"Dad!" he called, rushing over and wagging his tail. He pulled to a stop when he saw Shade, looking from him to Balto and back with a mix of surprise and confusion on his face.

"Hi, son," Balto said, greeting his progeny with the usual nuzzle. "Gotta get back to your mother, but I brought a friend over. Meet Shade. Shade, this is-"

It was at that moment that he became aware of a low, almost inaudible growl. Turning around, he saw Shade eyeing the men who were stoking the furnace.

"Shade?"

Shade shook himself. "I'm not too crazy about humans," he rumbled, glancing toward the door.

Kodi's ears pricked up. "Why? What's wrong with humans?"

"I don't want to talk about it," Shade replied tersely.

Balto tried to stifle his misgivings. "Well, these guys I know," he assured. "They won't do a thing to you, I promise."

"Besides," Kodi added, "they're stoking the fire." He still didn't know what was up with Shade, but he evidently figured he should back up his dad until he understood the situation better.

Shade snorted, but was willing to take their word for it. Glancing around, he slunk off to an unoccupied corner of the room and lay down behind a pile of split firewood.

Kodi turned to Balto. "What's up with him?" he asked in a whisper.

"I don't know," Balto murmured, shaking his head slightly. "I found him out in the woods yesterday with no idea who he is."

At this the sled dog blinked. "Wait, what?"

Despite Balto's wish to keep things quiet, one or two of the other sled dogs pricked up their ears too. "Whaddya mean no idea?" asked Ralph.

Balto groaned inside. Something deep in his gut told him that any inquisitiveness would put Shade on edge. Given how off he already seemed, the last thing anyone needed was him getting upset. "I mean he doesn't remember anything – or at least not anything he wants to talk about."

"Well that's pretty strange," Kirby remarked loudly enough for the whole room to hear. "What kind of dog doesn't know who he is?"

Desperate to keep things from getting out of paw, Balto coughed loudly. "Look, I don't know what's happened to him, but he's my friend. Please, just… be nice to him, alright? Give him his space, be polite if he talks to you or you talk to him, and don't ask him too many questions."

He glanced out of the corner of his eye at Shade, who was pretending not to care what they said. All the same, he had one ear cocked to hear their conversation.

Lowering his voice, Balto added, "I don't think he's dangerous, but he might get excited now and then. He spent last night at my boat and this morning he swore it was haunted."

All three of them widened their eyes. "Hau-" asked Kirby, but Balto stopped him with a look.

" _Don't_ ask him about it," he ordered. "Just look out for him, okay? He needs friends." He said it in as caring a tone as possible, but his expression clearly added, 'Be careful.'

Wary looks decorate all their faces. "Are you saying he might be nuts?" asked Ralph.

"You'd better not mean me," growled Shade from across the room, making all of them jump.

Balto cleared his throat. "No, we were talking about mutts," he said a little louder than was necessary. Then he looked warningly at the team. "I don't know what's going on," he answered, "but I know _you_ guys know how to act around new dogs in town. Please."

They all looked at one another, and then all eyes turned to Kodi. Kodi looked as though he were mentally begging them to look anywhere else. Being the lead dog had its drawbacks.

At last, he turned back to his father and lowered his voice until it was barely audible. "Um, Dad, this might not be the best time. Dusty and I've been talking about… well, what you and Mom asked last week."

Now it was Balto's turn to be dismayed. It had been no secret that his son and the team's sole female had a thing going, and the previous week Jenna had asked in jest when they should expect the first litter of grandpups from the two. Both of the younger dogs had taken it half in stride at the time, but if they were really… oh, boy, that made it messy.

He looked over towards where the grayish female napped in a corner. "Is she…?"

Kodi gulped. "Uh, well, it's… possible."

Balto sighed, not wanting to think that over any farther. Under any other circumstances he'd have been proud that his son officially had a mate now, especially one who suited him as well as Dusty did. Right now, though, there was a dilemma more pressing than any celebration. "Well, I'm sorry the timing's bad, but can we at least do this until something else comes up? He could die out there."

Kodi turned his gaze to Shade, then back to the pile of sacks where Dusty lay asleep, unaware of the conversation and its implications for her chances of motherhood. Unless he wanted to wake her up, he'd have to speak for both of them.

"Okay, we'll keep quiet," he agreed, turning his eyes again to Shade's corner. "I just hope he's not dangerous. He looks like he's seen his share of fights if you ask me."

With a mixture of relief and worry, Balto left the team there and set out to get back to Jenna. As he left, he checked in on Shade meaning to tell him that everything was fine. The old dog was asleep, so he decided to leave him to it.

Later, as the musher fed the sled team their usual portions of smoked fish, Shade emerged from hiding to help himself to a few pieces behind the man's back. As the other dogs crowded around, Dusty woke up and moved in for her share only to be jostled aside by Ralph.

"Hey!" she yelped, tumbling on her side.

The other dogs chuckled, only to be stopped by a low growl which was almost a roar. The musher jumped at the sound, landing on Kirby's paw as he turned to confront this stray.

"Down, boy," he ordered, casting about and snatching up a piece of firewood for protection.

Shade glowered at him, then backed up a few steps and locked eyes with Ralph.

"Didn't your mother ever teach you how to treat a female?" he asked, somewhat in anger but mostly in disdain.

The sled team – even Dusty – all stared at him in surprise. Sure it had been rude of Ralph, but it looked as if Shade wanted to start a fight.

"Hey, calm down," Kodi cut in, stepping up. "I'm sure he didn't mean it and he's sorry, right Ralph?"

"Uh, right," the bulky husky nodded, backing up.

Shade looked over to Dusty as if seeking her affirmation, then shrugged and relaxed. "Well, that's alright then," he answered, at once the very picture of calmness. Then, picking up his piece of fish, he walked off to the corner and settled down to some dedicated chewing.

The sled dogs all looked at one another in confusion. "Okay, what was up with that?" one of them asked quietly.

As soon as the musher calmed down from the brief spat and literally looked the other way, Kodi slipped gingerly over to Shade.

"Listen, uh… Shade, thanks for watching out for my mate, okay? I appreciate it."

Shade turned one eye towards him. "I'm too aggressive for the room, is that it?"

Kodi swallowed, unsure how to be diplomatic about this. Usually he would have been very blunt, but this guy was a friend of Dad's, obviously temperamental, and totally unpredictable; hardly the same as lecturing his teammates for lazy running. "Well, I guess it would have been nice with less growling."

Shade swallowed and turned toward him. "Well, sorry about that," he said in a perfectly neutral tone. Then as an afterthought, he added, "Your pop's nervous about me, isn't he?"

This question came so out of left field that Kodi was speechless, leaving Shade to piece together the answer on his own. It didn't take long, and when he did the follow-up remark was as mysterious and unsettling as the question itself.

"He's a smart dog."

All Kodi could do was stare. What was _with_ this guy?

 _When will this end?_

Again the enemies clashed, she and the shadow, and again the shade's rage and hate burned into her like the fires of Tophet. How many times, she wondered, had they wounded one another in this mad, deathless war? Had they been ten years or a thousand in this place without landmarks; this realm without time; this unending, sleepless nightmare? She would have gone mad long ago – if the words meant anything here – were it not for the fight.

Suddenly, the darkness was gone. How or where, she did not know. In this realm all rules seemed ended, and her enemy could come or go without warning. She could do so too, and drag him back if she willed, but he could best her at it. It took terrible strength to hold him, and utmost cunning to slip his grasp. It was torment to keep him near, and torment to let him free to do… she didn't want to think what he was doing.

Collapsing to the ground, even if such was only possible in her mind, she welcomed the unexpected reprieve and braced herself for the next assault. How long she had, she didn't know. Time had no meaning here. A thousand years was indistinguishable from a moment in this place. It was impossible to tell, when the shade left off attacking, how long he would be gone. When he struck again, she could never tell how long he had been away. She must rest.

Yet she could not rest. What was the shade doing? She had learned, with pain, to read the mysteries of this place through the timeless time of her imprisonment, though the place was trackless and forever inconstant. The shade's plans were always hidden to her, if he had any at all, but she had learned to know things.

Pushed by desperation, she gathered her strength for one more effort. She must know, and what had she to lose? It wasn't as though she could die trying.

It was well that she could not die, or even pass out, because the pain of taking in so heavily guarded a secret was as if she were eating a hedgehog the size of a pig. Yet at last the knowledge came, and with it a smiting thunderbolt of fear.

 _The shade has the secret!_

Like running into a boulder, the truth struck her out of all thought and motion. Yet even in eternity there was no time to waste. Gathering her senses, she lunged to hinder her foe and drag him back into battle. She had to press the fight now; had to press it if it took forever twice told.

Armed with the secret, the shade could destroy all for which she had fought and suffered… and she would be helpless to stop him.

 **A/N: Sorry again to take so long working on this. I should have posted this chapter a lot sooner, but life, life, and more life kept whopping me over the head.**

 **Anyway, better late than never. Hope it was worth the wait. :)**


End file.
